Being single during cuffing season can be tough.
Yesterday, I went to the mall with my best friend to try and grab some last-minute gifts, and I was surrounded by mushy couples everywhere. I’m not gonna lie, it made me feel some type of way. In fact, I looked over at her while we were on the escalator and said, “I want a boyfriend.” She responded, “Why?” (lol) And I simply told her, “Because I wanna come to the mall with him and do cute ass shit.”
Maybe not my most eloquent answer, but that’s the truth. There are plenty of moments that I find myself thinking, man, this would be cool with someone else here. And the holiday hoopla definitely doesn’t help ease the loneliness that can sometimes start brewing inside that heart this time of year, but you know what? This isn’t my first rodeo. I’ve survived plenty of single holiday seasons, and when I’m not being drowned in other people’s PDA, adorable IG pics or my own pity party (sigh), I remember that this season doesn’t have to be such a sob story for those who are riding it solo.
Here are 7 things you can do to remind yourself that being single during the holidays can actually be chill AF:
- Buy Yourself a Rad Gift: So, you don’t have a boo thing to surprise you with a cute ass gift–assuming they know what to get you. It’s all good, because that also means you don’t have to stress and spend money on getting someone else something, either (let alone their entire family). Instead, walk that pretty booty into your favorite shop or hop online and splurge on yourself, because guess what? You are your priority this Christmas, so have at it.
- Take a Trip: If you think traveling alone is depressing, I’m gonna need you to exit this dark hole you’ve created and channel your inner Elizabeth Gilbert, because everyone needs some Eat, Pray, Love in their life. Why stay in town for the holidays if you don’t have to? I’m going to share a secret with you–Travel Pirates is an app that alerts you of all the craziest travel deals with destinations around the world. Get yourself some luggage, pick a destination, and just go.
- Be a Mistletoe Ho (Ho, Ho): OK, I’m not telling you to be a ho, but that lead-in was too good to pass up. What I’m saying is this–if you’re at a party or out somewhere and you see someone who catches your eye, make a move (and if you’re really about that life, carry mistletoe with you)! You’re single, you’re awesome, and mistletoe is the perfect ice breaker to at least start a semi-awkward-but-always-memorable conversation with a stranger, even if it doesn’t end up in a liberating makeout sesh.
- Throw a Singles Holiday Bash: I know how annoying it can get to always be the single person at holiday soirees, so put together a little single and mingle get together for those who are in the same boat (this is especially great for New Years). If you’re like me and most of your friends are either married or in a serious relationship (yep, not kidding), then make it a party of one. Listen, I have no shame in throwing on some festive pjs (a onesie, preferably) and marathoning something on Netflix with a pint of ice cream. I know movies have made this the typical sad-girl scene, but ain’t nothing sad about being comfortable, entertained and fed. Thank you.
- Take a Sigh of Relief: You don’t have to worry about whose house you’re spending what night at, or how many new family members you have to meet, or making a good impression, or wanting that last piece of dessert but fighting yourself away because you already had two pieces and the kids want more. All of that is out the window. You have that last piece of pie. You unbutton your pants if you have to. Hell, wear sweats, who cares?
- Decorate How You Want To: Or not at all, if Grinchmas is your thing. Colored lights or white lights, bright garland or a string of popcorn, tree or no tree, fake or real–whatever puts you in your holiday zen and spirit, you can do without having to consult anyone else.
- Create a Game Plan for the New Year: Listen, I get it. It’s nice to have someone around and even with everything I just said, there’s a part of you that still wishes you could share these moments with a person you love. Well, one day, you will. I promise. So instead of rushing to become part of a pair, use this time to focus on you. This is literally the only time in your life when you can be selfish and not feel bad about it. You don’t have to consider your significant other’s feelings or your kid’s feelings, because trust me, once that chapter of your life comes, they will become priority. So give yourself some of that lovin’ that you’re storing away for someone who’s not even here yet. Get out a paper and pen, write down what you want to happen this next year. Create a vision board. Build something that’s all your own. And ladies, my best friend has some great stuff to help keep you inspired through her brand, Her Own Lane.
So whaddya say?